


Misty Dreams

by Starship21ZedNA9



Category: due South
Genre: Friendship, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2017-10-11
Packaged: 2019-01-16 00:49:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12332166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starship21ZedNA9/pseuds/Starship21ZedNA9
Summary: Fraser has a nightmare which leads to a much needed conversation between him and Ray Vecchio.





	Misty Dreams

Benton Fraser didn't know where he was. His eyes scanned the horizon but all he saw was an endless sea of gray. Gray mist covering white snow, stretching out to meet the low hanging clouds. He could barely make out his own hands in front of his face. 

"Ray," he tried. "Dief?"

Nothing. Silence. 

He turned in all directions, searching for something or someone. Try as he did, he couldn't recall how he'd gotten here. How he'd gotten separated from his companions. He began walking through the snow but he didn't feel the cold that should have been there. He didn't hear the crunch beneath his boots like he should have. He didn't feel the moisture of the fog on his face. 

He was surrounded by nothing as he marched on. Finally, he saw a shape in the distance. A small dome sticking out of the ground. As he approached he could make out that it was a grave. He hesitated before sinking to his knees before it. He struggled to make out the words scratched into the stone. His stomach dropped. He froze where he knelt.

Raymond Vecchio  
Beloved Son and Brother

 

No. It didn't happen. It couldn't have happened. He would have known if that had happened. He would have been there. He wouldn't have allowed it to happen. There had to be a mistake. Fraser whirled around wildly. Nothing had changed. The world around him was dry mist. He heard his own voice cry out in anguish before everything disappeared.

 

****

 

Fraser woke with a gasp. His heart was pounding out of his chest. His eyes tried to adjust to the darkness, the simple tombstone still burned in his mind. A pair of headlights briefly illuminated the room as a car eased by outside. His room. He was back in his own room in the small Chicago apartment he shared with Ray Kowalski. Dief lay asleep on tile below him. Ray curled up at his side. 

A nightmare then. That was all it had been. Fraser tried to calm himself. He didn't want to disturb his lover. 

"Frase?"

Too late.

The blonde head rose up to look at Fraser. Fraser could tell that Ray wasn't really awake. His voice was slurred and his eyes remained closed. He ran his fingers reassuringly through the other man's hair.

"It's all right, Ray. Go back to sleep."

Ray nodded and dropped his head back down. He sighed as he snuggled deep down against Fraser, until he was pressed against his side. Fraser smiled and absently ran his fingers through the unruly locks. Taking a deep breath, he shut his eyes and tried to find his way back into sleep. All he could see against his closed eyelids was mist. The little grave always just out of reach.

He glanced at the bedside clock. The neon orange numbers informing him that it was half past 3. He hesitated, knowing he was being silly, but he picked up the phone anyway. He moved as little as possible so he wouldn't wake Ray up again.

The voice that answered on the other end of the line was as groggy as his Ray's had been minutes ago.

"Yeah?"

"Ray, I'm so sorry to disturb you. We'll speak in the morning."

"Benny? No, no, no, wait. Don't hang up. What's going on? You all right? Stanley okay?"

"Yes, Ray. Everyone is fine. I suppose I just..."

"You just what? Why are you calling me in the middle of the night?"

Fraser hesitated, feeling ridiculous. He couldn't tell a lie, especially not to one of the two people on Earth who really and truly knew him. It was best just to be honest with the man.

"I had a nightmare."

Incredulous silence was the only answer.

"Ray?"

"Yeah. Um, you had a nightmare?"

"Yes."

"About...me?"

"Yes."

"Okay. Would you care to elaborate on that, Benny?"

"Ah. Of course. Well, I found myself alone in a kind of imitation of the Northwest Territories. I called for Ray and Diefenbaker but of course, there was no response. I can remember thinking that they must have gotten lost. I couldn't recall how I'd gotten there or how I became separated-."

"As great a story as this is, could you get to the point? I have to be in court in four hours." Ray's voice took on that carefully calm quality. The way he would get when he was irritated with Fraser but tried to keep his temper anyway.

"I'm sorry, Ray. I came across a small grave. Your name was on it."

There was a long pause. Fraser waited, his hand absently fiddling with golden locks of hair and his lover slept on.

"I see. And that worried you enough to call me?"

"Well, yes Ray. I suppose it did. I suppose I just wanted to reassure myself that you were well."

"I'm well. Or I would be if I were still asleep. I appreciate the gesture and all, but this probably could have waited until morning."

Fraser knew he should say his good nights and let Ray off the phone and back to bed. But, he found that he wasn't able to just yet.

"I also wanted to reassure you."

"Me? It wasn't my dream."

Fraser ran a hand over his brow. He wasn't explaining himself correctly.

"No, no. I realize that, Ray. I suppose that I meant...when you were away, I had the occasional dream much like the one I had tonight. I felt helpless. You were unreachable. You were in a dangerous situation and I was unable to aid you. I wouldn't have even known if you were in need of help. It felt as if..."

His voice trailed off. His mind drifted back to restless, tormented nights in the Consulate, when he couldn't get the thought of Ray Vecchio out of his head. Nights when he feared he would never see his friend again.

Ray's voice brought him back to himself.

"It felt like what, Benny?"

"It felt like a failure. It felt like I failed you."

He'd never really spoken to Ray about his time in Vegas. Anytime he broached the subject, his friend got a far off look in his eyes, shifted uncomfortably and changed topics. He didn't want to push him, deciding that if Ray ever wanted to speak about it, he would tell him in his own time. Unfortunately, that meant keeping quiet about his own feelings during that time of no contact. Of not knowing.

"Benny, you didn't fail me. Okay? Not ever. Things that happened in Vegas. They're in the past. And there wasn't anything you could have done to help me. You're here for me now. That's what counts."

"I am, Ray. Always," Fraser said sincerely.

"I know that. You don't have to feel guilty or responsible for me or whatever. It all worked out, okay?"

"Yes, it did," Fraser said, smiling fondly down at Ray Kowalski.

"You gonna be okay if I hang up now," Ray asked.

"I will. I'm sorry that I woke you."

"Don't apologize. If it made you feel better, then it's fine. I'll see you later, okay Benny?"

"All right, Ray. Good luck in court tomorrow."

"Thanks. Night."

"Goodnight, Ray."

Fraser waited until the line went dead before hanging up. The nightmare was beginning to fade from his mind now. He sank deep into the mattress and gripped Ray a little tighter. Ray's arm tightened around his waist in unconscious response. Fraser let sleep take him again and this time he dreamed in color.


End file.
